|
Where
to find women.
So, you’re
a guy and you want to meet chicks. Well actually you want to do a bit
more than that – but first things first. The mistake most blokes make is
going to clubs and pubs in search of nookie. Bad move! There’s far too
much competition – and the other guys are better looking, better hung
and drive better cars than you. So let’s face it there’s more chance of
your granny winning the sex olympics that there is of you scoring at the
pub. Here’s a list of places where it’s easier for Lazy Sods to find
willing chicks:
Brothels: Even the scruffiest, Lazy Sod
can usually get a leg over in a brothel. Simply turn up, pay the money
and select from the range of old hags on offer. As these mouldy-oldies
will remind you of your granny, you will want to shoot your load quickly
then get the hell out of the place. All that’s left to be done is to
arrange a trip to the VD Clinic for another doze of penicillin.
Opticians: Loiter outside any opticians
and you’ll see a constant stream of shaggable totty. They have one thing
in common – they’re all half-blind and unable to see what a scruffy,
vile specimen of a sleazebag you are. So putting it bluntly – you’re in
with a chance. But these sensitive souls must be treated gently. Our
research shows that many chat-up lines simply offend these ladies.
Avoid the following:
* Hey
four-eyes can you see your way to giving me a blow-job?
* Would
you like to rub my cock with your white cane?
* Neat bi-focals
– does that mean you’re bisexual?
* Fancy a
threesome with me and your guide dog?
 |
